Another little update. I talked to Karen (Clinical Coordinator) at the Wellness Center today. She is getting back to me with the fee info on laundering Mom's sheets. I asked her about Lifeline or Medalert, and she said that all those companies will respond to an alert by calling 911, which circumvents the Lima staff. The police would arrive. I'm not sure she's entirely right about that - thinking about some of David's stories. I had previously verified that Mom only needs to formally sign out of OBT if she is going outside of Lima Estates, but she is supposed to inform someone at the OBT desk of her destination any time she leaves OBT. I don't know if Mom really goes far from OBT often (like to the main lobby even), but she does go regularly to the computer room upstairs. Karen is putting the computer room on her chart, so that they would think to look there if they didn't know where she was. Karen also recommended that Mom be told that she has to formally sign out whenever she goes anywhere (Mom is going to love this), and Karen is going to tell OBT this.
I also talked to the PT dept today - I think Tricia is the main therapist, but Mike is also there (and Chris floats back and forth between Lima and Granite). Mike answered the phone, and I asked him about Dad's status with the walker. He said Dad is doing well with it and getting stronger, but is still on supervised-use only. Unlike at Granite (I think), Dad is not allowed to get up from anywhere (wheelchair or bed) without supervision. He has to push the call button from bed in the morning in order to arise. Lima even has pressure-sensitive pads that are put under him both on his wheelchair seat and in bed - if he gets up without calling someone an alarm goes off. This has happened at least a few times and Dad is upset. He says he can't even turn around without an alarm going off. Maybe it wasn't well-explained to him beforehand, or maybe he just didn't remember about it, but he's been a bit disturbed for the last few days. I didn't even know about the alarm until yesterday, so I explained to him then. Dad is just generally down on the whole business - the alarm, going to the activities where people next to him are asleep in their wheelchairs ("what good is that!"), said "this whole thing" doesn't seem to be working. Mike said he had a bit of a "meltdown" in therapy, expressing his unhappiness about stuff. Also, Dad is upset that he can't eat with Mom (which is because Mom won't come to Willowbrook to eat with him, and he can't eat at OBT because of the special diet). Mom apparently asked Mike repeatedly today who she should talk to that could allow Dad to come to OBT for meals. Mike tried to tell her to be patient, Dad has a special diet and still needs supervision, can't come to OBT yet. He thought Mom's pushing might be making Dad anxious. (M and D have therapy at the same time, when possible, so Dad was there too.) Also Dad got in "trouble" with the nurse yesterday because they couldn't find his lower dentures in the AM, went on a major hunt. He had put them in his pants pocket when getting ready for bed (because the denture cup was in the bathroom, which he didn't know) and they ended up in the dirty clothes bag. I have put the cup next to his bed now, but I bet I should've labelled it "keep at bedside" because a different aide is bound to think it should go in the bathroom.
There sure seems to be a lot more fuss going on with Dad at Lima than at Granite. I do think a lot of it comes down to the alarm (which Mike said would likely be removed next week) and Mom's attitude. I swear Mom is like a butterfly these days, flits around, comes to rest for only a minute or two at a time. She doesn't eat with Dad, but she goes over to see him a few times a day, I think. I imagine she wheels in, plunks down his mail, says three sentences, and leaves. "Here's your mail, Fred. Did you have therapy this morning? OK then. See you later." At 3:30 yesterday, as I was leaving, she kissed Dad and said "See you tomorrow." She was going to take a nap, as was he, and he offered her to nap on his bed while he took the recliner. She said she'd rather go back to "her place." I suggested she come over after dinner to watch the news with Dad. She said she watches it at "her place." Eventually she allowed that she might come watch the news - "we'll see." Then "see you tomorrow" again.
About eating meals together, Mom also told me that she figured she'd wait until Dad's swallowing was better and he could eat at OBT. I should have said earlier that she did eat dinner at Willowbrook with him on Tues. and did not have a good experience. The "service was bad" - that is, her food was slow in coming and she didn't think it was what she ordered. I have told her that they would do a good job of transferring her order if her dinners at Willowbrook were prescheduled - like, MonWedFri, or whatever. She eats dinners with some friends, but I don't know about lunch. Maybe we can talk her into lunches with Dad.
Maybe today will be a better day.
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