Friday, December 31, 2010
Dad Moving Soon!
Great news. Dor called yesterday to say that they plan to move Dad to the medical unit at Lima on Monday. They still view this as a temporary move with the thought that Dad may move to assisted living (I'd be surprised, but we'll see).
Thursday, December 30, 2010
A New Home for Mom
The big news is that Mom is back at Lima as of yesterday. She has a room in assisted living. Dor spent a lot of time early in the week preparing for the move, working with Mom to figure out what furniture to move, arranging the furniture move, etc. David picked up Mom yesterday morn and brought her over. Dave, Dor, MB, and I all spent the afternoon there yesterday trying to get the place set up -- hanging mirrors, pictures, etc. We brought Dad over, too, to hang out for the afternoon. (Liz was enjoying a much deserved break in Florida.)
We went up to dinner in the main dining room and many, many people stopped to say hi and how glad they were to see Mom and Dad again. MB and I were so impressed with how caring everyone at Lima seems -- both the residents and the staff.
After dinner, Dor took Dad back to Granite Farms where her singing group, the Revels, just happened to be performing that evening! So, Dad got to see her perform.
The Lima folks have told us that they will probably have a room for Dad soon in the medical unit back at Lima. That would be an answer to prayer, as it may be a little tough for him now that he and Mom are in different facilities. Once they find a permanent room for him at Lima, I expect we will need to empty out the apartment. (As long as he is in a temporary place, the apartment is his residence.) Dad's health has not changed much since the last post. He's doing OK, but still needs to get stronger and he has problems with aspiration so he is on a pureed diet -- not a lot of fun and it results in him eating less.
Mom is adjusting to her new home. Although it is in the same Lima facility, it is quite different. She has a single room (though it is fairly large) and the assisted living area is a bit of a walk from the main part of the facility. She still has access to everything that she had access to before (e.g., main dining area), but most things are quite a distance so she has to make a special effort to walk up there. By default, she will eat and socialize in the smaller assisted living area. She does know some of the residents there, which is a good start.
I am still concerned about Mom not using the walker. Yesterday there were many times when she didn't use it. I would remind her, but she is stubborn. I would not be surprised if she barely uses it at all when she is alone in her room, and I wonder how long it will be until her next fall. That could be especially bad if there is no one there to see her. Not many people walk by her room -- all the action (nurses station, dining, etc.) is upstairs and her door is often shut -- so if something happened it could be a while until anyone found her. I think she needs to get one of those emergency buttons you wear on a necklace. Dorrie has some info on them -- recommendations are welcome!
Enough news for now. We will all see Mom and Dad again this coming Sunday when we get together at David and Sharon's for a belated family Christmas celebration. (M&D were at Dor's on Christmas day.)
BTW, Mom's address is now 'OBT 105' (instead of A332). The landline phone is being switched to her room, but as of yesterday it was not yet working.
We went up to dinner in the main dining room and many, many people stopped to say hi and how glad they were to see Mom and Dad again. MB and I were so impressed with how caring everyone at Lima seems -- both the residents and the staff.
After dinner, Dor took Dad back to Granite Farms where her singing group, the Revels, just happened to be performing that evening! So, Dad got to see her perform.
The Lima folks have told us that they will probably have a room for Dad soon in the medical unit back at Lima. That would be an answer to prayer, as it may be a little tough for him now that he and Mom are in different facilities. Once they find a permanent room for him at Lima, I expect we will need to empty out the apartment. (As long as he is in a temporary place, the apartment is his residence.) Dad's health has not changed much since the last post. He's doing OK, but still needs to get stronger and he has problems with aspiration so he is on a pureed diet -- not a lot of fun and it results in him eating less.
Mom is adjusting to her new home. Although it is in the same Lima facility, it is quite different. She has a single room (though it is fairly large) and the assisted living area is a bit of a walk from the main part of the facility. She still has access to everything that she had access to before (e.g., main dining area), but most things are quite a distance so she has to make a special effort to walk up there. By default, she will eat and socialize in the smaller assisted living area. She does know some of the residents there, which is a good start.
I am still concerned about Mom not using the walker. Yesterday there were many times when she didn't use it. I would remind her, but she is stubborn. I would not be surprised if she barely uses it at all when she is alone in her room, and I wonder how long it will be until her next fall. That could be especially bad if there is no one there to see her. Not many people walk by her room -- all the action (nurses station, dining, etc.) is upstairs and her door is often shut -- so if something happened it could be a while until anyone found her. I think she needs to get one of those emergency buttons you wear on a necklace. Dorrie has some info on them -- recommendations are welcome!
Enough news for now. We will all see Mom and Dad again this coming Sunday when we get together at David and Sharon's for a belated family Christmas celebration. (M&D were at Dor's on Christmas day.)
BTW, Mom's address is now 'OBT 105' (instead of A332). The landline phone is being switched to her room, but as of yesterday it was not yet working.
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
Not Following Doctor's Orders
From Dor:
hmmmm - she definitely was being a little over-ambitious Sunday. Betsy Fry gave her a ride to church Sunday morning and I couldn't see her from where I sit in the choir. When I caught up to her afterwards (she was with Betsy at one of the tables in our Alternative Christmas Market, which was a great place to talk to all kinds of people) I didn't see her walker. When I asked her about it, she said that she had left it in Betsy's car!! I had reinforced with Betsy that she would need some help getting up out of the car and asked her please just to drop her off at the ramp into the narthex, and then park, so that she wouldn't have to walk far on uneven ground. I didn't think to mention that the NEEDS to take the walker with her everywhere. She had no falls or bumps, but if I hadn't been holding her arm as we walked out to wait for Betsy, who brought the car around, there would have been another. She started to stumble forward walking down the ramp - even with one hand on the railing and me holding her other arm. I think the "it's ok to go alone" needs to be conditioned on absolute use of the walker at all times. She truly is really good with the walker - and after seeing her with it in church twice I thought she had cleared that hurdle of wanting to do without-so this is a bit of a setback.
I have some information on the Life-alert monitoring systems, BTW (actually a comparison chart of several such systems) - maybe I should bring it tomorrow? I think even in Assisted Living it might be a good idea for her to have something like that. Some day she will fall when there isn't a roomate (or spouse) to report it.
hmmmm - she definitely was being a little over-ambitious Sunday. Betsy Fry gave her a ride to church Sunday morning and I couldn't see her from where I sit in the choir. When I caught up to her afterwards (she was with Betsy at one of the tables in our Alternative Christmas Market, which was a great place to talk to all kinds of people) I didn't see her walker. When I asked her about it, she said that she had left it in Betsy's car!! I had reinforced with Betsy that she would need some help getting up out of the car and asked her please just to drop her off at the ramp into the narthex, and then park, so that she wouldn't have to walk far on uneven ground. I didn't think to mention that the NEEDS to take the walker with her everywhere. She had no falls or bumps, but if I hadn't been holding her arm as we walked out to wait for Betsy, who brought the car around, there would have been another. She started to stumble forward walking down the ramp - even with one hand on the railing and me holding her other arm. I think the "it's ok to go alone" needs to be conditioned on absolute use of the walker at all times. She truly is really good with the walker - and after seeing her with it in church twice I thought she had cleared that hurdle of wanting to do without-so this is a bit of a setback.
I have some information on the Life-alert monitoring systems, BTW (actually a comparison chart of several such systems) - maybe I should bring it tomorrow? I think even in Assisted Living it might be a good idea for her to have something like that. Some day she will fall when there isn't a roomate (or spouse) to report it.
Sunday, December 19, 2010
Another Fall
Just received from Liz:
Mom's nurse called me this evening to say that Mom had fallen in her room. She is fine - no effects from the fall. Robert (the nurse) had called me once before to report that she had a skin tear on her elbow. He said they have to call us to report any bump or bruise or what-have-you. I forgot to ask him tonight if Mom could tell him how the fall happened. All he told me was that her roommate came to get him, and he found Mom sitting on the floor between the legs of her walker. He checked her over for neurological signs and took her vital signs, since she said she had bumped her head. Everything checked out OK. He also said that she'd been given the therapists' OK to go anywhere within Willowbrook unescorted, as she was doing so well (we knew this), and he hoped this didn't effect that.
I will call LeeAnn at Lima tomorrow to find out some info about the move to Asst Living, but this new fall is unsettling to me. The social worker may yet be back in touch with a change in recommendation for the time-being.
Saturday, December 18, 2010
More from Dor
From an email Dor sent to Aunt Betty:
Mom has done much better this last week and I think it is more than physical; she has had more chances to engage with old friends both by phone and in person, and, as you said, though she takes a little time to "warm up" she is much less vague and much better able to think things through and carry her end of the conversation than she was a couple of weeks ago. I suspect that she was somewhat depressed - and a little traumatized, by how severe things seemed and this unexpected move to medical rather than home to Lima -- which just snowballed when Dad followed suit! She came to church last Sunday (thanks to Julie, who picked her up & brought her there) and tired pretty quickly - didn't stay after for fellowship hour - but has commented several times since on how good that felt. Caught up with some of her book club buddies and others who have been asking about her, used her walker "in public" for the first time and got much positive feedback on that. She came again yesterday - this time a memorial service - and did stay for the lunch reception after where she was able to see and talk with many old choir friends (it's always kind of an alumni choir when there is a memorial service) and again got much positive feedback on looking well, using walker:) etc. She was tired by the time I took her "home" but honestly the most chatty she has been in a while. It helped, too, that her PT therapist had told her Thursday that he thought she was close to "graduating" and would be glad to write a recommendation that she return to Lima - in Assisted Living - if that sounded good to her. She is VERY eager to have that happen. Multiple real steps forward here!!!! Real acceptance of the move to Assisted Living -- she is truly eager to be in a place she can call home - that doesn't feel so temporary - and she has come to appreciate the benefits of a handicap accessible bathroom, someone delivering her meds regularly, 3 meals rather than one, and some assistance bathing -- all things that she would not have in the apartment but will have in Assisted Living. And it has to have been a huge relief to have Dad's medical needs attended to by professionals. The difficult part of this process will be figuring out how to keep Dad and Mom close to one another. I am so worried that he will just wilt if she is not nearby - and it seems that though there is likely to be an Assisted Living space available very soon, medical beds for men are at a real premium at Lima. Dad definitely does not at this point qualify for Assisted Living. We will meet with the staff at Granite Farms next Wednesday to talk about their plan, and will hopefully know a little more then.
Meanwhile - a good week, with Christmas Eve & Christmas on the horizon, and both of them "getting out" for a bit! [I just spoke with M&D -- they were on the way to the Town House for lunch with Liz & Gary. This is Dad's first outing since going in the hospital. - rick]
Mom has done much better this last week and I think it is more than physical; she has had more chances to engage with old friends both by phone and in person, and, as you said, though she takes a little time to "warm up" she is much less vague and much better able to think things through and carry her end of the conversation than she was a couple of weeks ago. I suspect that she was somewhat depressed - and a little traumatized, by how severe things seemed and this unexpected move to medical rather than home to Lima -- which just snowballed when Dad followed suit! She came to church last Sunday (thanks to Julie, who picked her up & brought her there) and tired pretty quickly - didn't stay after for fellowship hour - but has commented several times since on how good that felt. Caught up with some of her book club buddies and others who have been asking about her, used her walker "in public" for the first time and got much positive feedback on that. She came again yesterday - this time a memorial service - and did stay for the lunch reception after where she was able to see and talk with many old choir friends (it's always kind of an alumni choir when there is a memorial service) and again got much positive feedback on looking well, using walker:) etc. She was tired by the time I took her "home" but honestly the most chatty she has been in a while. It helped, too, that her PT therapist had told her Thursday that he thought she was close to "graduating" and would be glad to write a recommendation that she return to Lima - in Assisted Living - if that sounded good to her. She is VERY eager to have that happen. Multiple real steps forward here!!!! Real acceptance of the move to Assisted Living -- she is truly eager to be in a place she can call home - that doesn't feel so temporary - and she has come to appreciate the benefits of a handicap accessible bathroom, someone delivering her meds regularly, 3 meals rather than one, and some assistance bathing -- all things that she would not have in the apartment but will have in Assisted Living. And it has to have been a huge relief to have Dad's medical needs attended to by professionals. The difficult part of this process will be figuring out how to keep Dad and Mom close to one another. I am so worried that he will just wilt if she is not nearby - and it seems that though there is likely to be an Assisted Living space available very soon, medical beds for men are at a real premium at Lima. Dad definitely does not at this point qualify for Assisted Living. We will meet with the staff at Granite Farms next Wednesday to talk about their plan, and will hopefully know a little more then.
Meanwhile - a good week, with Christmas Eve & Christmas on the horizon, and both of them "getting out" for a bit! [I just spoke with M&D -- they were on the way to the Town House for lunch with Liz & Gary. This is Dad's first outing since going in the hospital. - rick]
Friday, December 17, 2010
Dad (not?) walking and more
Emails from Liz & Dor:
[Liz] Dad had an appt with a urologist today to see if he could have the catheter removed yet. Answer was "no", basically because he is not strong enough to get himself to the bathroom when needed. After 3 more weeks of physical therapy for strengthening, he will have a return visit to the urologist. He does not yet do any walking except during physical therapy sessions (or getting himself to the wheelchair)
[Dorrie] Wednesday night he was! wheelchair was parked near the door when I got there, Dad was alert in the chair watching TV, walker at his side, and got up (very slowly, leaning on counter for support, but definitely unassisted) and walked to the door with me. We stood there for quite a few minutes because my phone rang & it was Julie, & I put her on to say "hello to granddad" and they chatted for quite a few minutes -- he holding the phone in one hand & leaning on the walker with the other. He had quite bit of fun with the phone that "didn't need to be plugged in to anything - "isn't that something? how does that thing work?" I was standing there worried that he was standing too long but he seemed ok. We retreated back to his bedside after, since it had been a few minutes, and he was definitely tiring. I asked if he had been taking some regular walks and he said "yes, some" but Liz talked to the nurses today and it seems the walks are while he is in PT. He has not walked to dinner on his own or anywhere unattended. He is for sure stronger than he was a week ago, but I would in fact worry about him walking (even with the walker) unattended.
unrelated - but since we are on email together - their dear friend Ruth Crissey died yesterday morning. I talked to Mom Wednesday night; told her this seemed imminent; she learned the fact here today. Dad still doesn't know; Liz will tell him tomorrow if Mom hasn't already. Memorial service not til January and I will make sure they can get to it.
[Liz] Dad had an appt with a urologist today to see if he could have the catheter removed yet. Answer was "no", basically because he is not strong enough to get himself to the bathroom when needed. After 3 more weeks of physical therapy for strengthening, he will have a return visit to the urologist. He does not yet do any walking except during physical therapy sessions (or getting himself to the wheelchair)
[Dorrie] Wednesday night he was! wheelchair was parked near the door when I got there, Dad was alert in the chair watching TV, walker at his side, and got up (very slowly, leaning on counter for support, but definitely unassisted) and walked to the door with me. We stood there for quite a few minutes because my phone rang & it was Julie, & I put her on to say "hello to granddad" and they chatted for quite a few minutes -- he holding the phone in one hand & leaning on the walker with the other. He had quite bit of fun with the phone that "didn't need to be plugged in to anything - "isn't that something? how does that thing work?" I was standing there worried that he was standing too long but he seemed ok. We retreated back to his bedside after, since it had been a few minutes, and he was definitely tiring. I asked if he had been taking some regular walks and he said "yes, some" but Liz talked to the nurses today and it seems the walks are while he is in PT. He has not walked to dinner on his own or anywhere unattended. He is for sure stronger than he was a week ago, but I would in fact worry about him walking (even with the walker) unattended.
unrelated - but since we are on email together - their dear friend Ruth Crissey died yesterday morning. I talked to Mom Wednesday night; told her this seemed imminent; she learned the fact here today. Dad still doesn't know; Liz will tell him tomorrow if Mom hasn't already. Memorial service not til January and I will make sure they can get to it.
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Moving in the Right Direction
A few bits of info:
Just spoke with Dorrie who is visiting M&D right now. Sounds like both of them are improving. In particular, she mentioned that Dad is now using a walker instead of the wheelchair.
Talked with Mom earlier today. She was very happy that Josh had dinner with them yesterday.
Mom did get to church as planned on Sunday (thanks, Julie). I think she was very glad to get out and see people again. She plans to be back there for a memorial service this coming Friday.
Next Wednesday is an evaluation meeting. All of the folks involved in M&D's care will be there together with Mom, Dad, and as many of us kids as can make it (some by phone). I'm hoping that we will come out of there with a plan for what happens next. Am guessing Mom will not go anywhere until then, though she would like to.
Oh, and I think we have the most critical parts of Dad's finances figured out. I believe my initial concerns were unfounded.
Just spoke with Dorrie who is visiting M&D right now. Sounds like both of them are improving. In particular, she mentioned that Dad is now using a walker instead of the wheelchair.
Talked with Mom earlier today. She was very happy that Josh had dinner with them yesterday.
Mom did get to church as planned on Sunday (thanks, Julie). I think she was very glad to get out and see people again. She plans to be back there for a memorial service this coming Friday.
Next Wednesday is an evaluation meeting. All of the folks involved in M&D's care will be there together with Mom, Dad, and as many of us kids as can make it (some by phone). I'm hoping that we will come out of there with a plan for what happens next. Am guessing Mom will not go anywhere until then, though she would like to.
Oh, and I think we have the most critical parts of Dad's finances figured out. I believe my initial concerns were unfounded.
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