More from Dor

From an email Dor sent to Aunt Betty:

Mom has done much better this last week and I think it is more than physical; she has had more chances to engage with old friends both by phone and in person, and, as you said, though she takes a little time to "warm up" she is much less vague and much better able to think things through and carry her end of the conversation than she was a couple of weeks ago.  I suspect that she was somewhat depressed - and a little traumatized, by how severe things seemed and this unexpected move to medical rather than home to Lima -- which just snowballed when Dad followed suit! She came to church last Sunday (thanks to Julie, who picked her up & brought her there) and tired pretty quickly - didn't stay after for fellowship hour - but has commented several times since on how good that felt.  Caught up with some of her book club buddies and others who have been asking about her, used her walker "in public" for the first time and got much positive feedback on that.   She came again yesterday - this time a memorial service - and did stay for the lunch reception after where she was able to see and talk with many old choir friends (it's always kind of an alumni choir when there is a memorial service) and again got much positive feedback on looking well, using walker:) etc.  She was tired by the time I took her "home" but honestly the most chatty she has been in a while.   It helped, too, that her PT therapist had told her Thursday that he thought she was close to "graduating" and would be glad to write a recommendation that she return to Lima - in Assisted Living - if that sounded good to her.  She is VERY eager to have that happen.  Multiple real steps forward here!!!!  Real acceptance of the move to Assisted Living -- she is truly eager to be in a place she can call home - that doesn't feel so temporary - and she has come to appreciate the benefits of a handicap accessible bathroom, someone delivering her meds regularly, 3 meals rather than one, and some assistance bathing -- all things that she would not have in the apartment but will have in Assisted Living.  And it has to have been a huge relief to have Dad's medical needs attended to by professionals.  The difficult part of this process will be figuring out how to keep Dad and Mom close to one another.  I am so worried that he will just wilt if she is not nearby - and it seems that though there is likely to be an Assisted Living space available very soon, medical beds for men are at a real premium at Lima.  Dad definitely does not at this point qualify for Assisted Living.  We will meet with the staff at Granite Farms next Wednesday to talk about their plan, and will hopefully know a little more then.

Meanwhile - a good week, with Christmas Eve & Christmas on the horizon, and both of them "getting out" for a bit!  [I just spoke with M&D -- they were on the way to the Town House for lunch with Liz & Gary.  This is Dad's first outing since going in the hospital. - rick]