12/10 Visit

Went down yesterday to visit and to deal with bank paperwork so that we can access Dad's accounts to pay the bills (and to understand the whole financial situation).

Stopped at Lima, picked up the mail, and spent a while at the apartment finding things (Liz, thanks for the pointer to the papers in the dresser drawer).  Among other things, I found a reassuring statement for Mom's investments.

Got over to see M&D just before dinner.  I first stopped in Mom's room and the speech therapist (Christine?) was just finishing up with her.  Didn't realize Mom needed speech therapy.  As the therapist told me a little later, she does cognitive stuff related to communication.  She was quizzing Mom about how to deal with what to do if she is running late for an appointment.  I thought Mom did very well with the questions -- at least as well as I would have:)  (M&D both later expressed that they didn't like the speech therapy - "too many questions".)

As Mom was getting ready, I went to Dad's room.  He was standing looking confused and very glad to see me.  ("Seeing you is that best thing that ever happened to me!  ... Well, maybe not the best")  He was trying to figure out how to get in touch with Mom because he knew it was time to go to dinner.  I assured him that Mom will always come and get him at meal time.  This points out a few things:

• Standing does not seem to be a problem.  He can get himself up OK, and when he is standing, he doesn't feel like he immediately needs to sit.  However, he doesn't walk except a few steps to get into the wheelchair.  I hope the PT gets him walking again.
• Looking back on it, I realize that he knew it was dinner time, so even though his sense of time is wacky he is good with clocks.  Although the more I think about it, the more I'm not sure there is even a clock in the room and the watch he wears is broken (that's another story).  Hmm.
• Although Liz went to great pains to write instructions on how to use the cell phone, he didn't know how to use it to call Mom.  In fact, he may not have even thought about using it.  It and the instructions are sort of behind him and hard to see.  But I am pretty sure that he couldn't have done it even if he had picked it up.  Dealing with even very simple instructions to work electronics is too hard.  He can do some things with the simple TV remote, probably only because he is so used to it.  When Dorrie called later, I had to tell him how to answer it.  I hope that is something he can learn.  I also brought our CD player (Mom has the one from the apartment) and some CDs that I thought he would like from the apartment.  I put on the compilation of 'Fred's Faves' that Elizabeth made him  and he really seemed to like that.  I have doubts about whether he will be able to make the CD player play when he wants, though I told him all he needs to do is push the play button.

We met Mom for dinner.  Mom has been getting Dad at mealtimes and going to eat with him.  This is a great thing, though I think she misses eating with the three ladies she had been eating with previously.  The three of us had dinner in the 'quiet room'.  It was wonderful.  (I highly recommend joining them for a meal.)  Mom is doing quite well.  One of the staff there said something to the effect that Mom is close to getting out.  The main issue is whether she will be religious about using the walker.  She is using it all the time, but occasionally when she is moving about in a small space she will go without -- not good.  When they brought M&D's dinners but mine was a little late coming , Mom jumped up, grabbed her walker, and went out to let them know that I needed food.  I guess that's part of what they call her 'impulsivity'.  We had a nice time eating and chatting.  Get this:  Mom only ate half her dinner and Dad ate all of his (except the jello salad).  In fact, he ate my dessert, too!  That was great to see.  The nurse gave Dad his pills at that time and I asked how his sugar was.  The nurse said that they put him on a different med and his sugar is doing very well now -- great news.

As we were walking back to the room, we got talking about the computer.  Mom would like to do email again.  Someone had taken her up to the library where she found a computer; however, she couldn't figure it out.  I think it is set up a little differently from the one at Lima.  She probably just needs someone to help her get started.  She also didn't think she could find her way to the library again.  Anyway, I think those problems may be ironed out soon and I expect we will see her emailing again before too long.

Back at the room we watched the news for an hour.  Then Mom decided it was time for her to go.  Dad and I hung out, listened to music, and talked about the pictures in the digital picture frame (I brought it over from the apartment).  Although Dad has various mental issues, he is great company and can carry on a conversation.

We also called Aunt Kathy.  I had been hoping to get to see her, too, but it was too late.  Anyway, I had a nice talk with her and Dad talked to her some.  It would be good to get them all together.

During this time, Dad polished off half a package of graham crackers that I had brought over at Dorrie's recommendation -- good call, Dor.  If you are visiting, make sure that there is an open package he can reach, because he will not be able to open a new one himself (I can barely do it).

Regarding Dad's other health issues:  I did not hear any mention of the bed sores (and I forgot to ask), so I think that is going better.  It did sound like he still has some bowel issues.  He gave a rather hilarious explanation about it that made no sense to me.  A new(?) issue is his left eye.  It was very red and looked a little infected.  Meant to ask the nurse, but I forgot.

I won't be getting down again for a while, but Liz and Dor have been great about visiting.  Also, I understand that there is a plan for Julie to take Mom to church Sunday.  It will be good for them to see Julie, and I think that will be Mom's first time out in public in weeks.  Josh and Rebek are also likely to stop by this week, which M&D will very much enjoy.